homesick

I miss mum
I miss dad
I miss my brother & sister
..............
.........
.....

I miss home

Losing myself

I'm losing
I'm drowning
I need reassurance
Not from a biased person
Not from someone who are used to me
But from someone honest
Someone objective enough
To tell me who I am
What I am good at
What I am supposed to be

Sorry, I'm being really emotional these few days
I need something that will help me prove my worth in this strange and foreign environment, completely different with my really comfortable zone back then

anyone?

An Emotional Time

I have been quite emo as of lately. The history is that one of the people I despised most (and I will stress that I don't despise people easily) came over to my house and ordered around as if he is King. Actually I haven't been angry for quite some time already. I remembered the last time I was angry was in grade 11. But yet I was not really angry that time. So you can say that I don't remember the last time I was really angry. I can't even recall I've been really really angry like this time. (if angry was the emotion I experienced at all).

Sorry, the writing is a bit crappy. I'm not really into typing things that need to be thought before. I just want to express my so called angry feeling.

Anyway, even after two weeks, if the topic was brought up, I still feel the same way as before - be it anger or not. Let me describe the emotion:
1. My head becomes really hot.
2. Afterward I got headache
3. My breathing becomes heavy
4. I cry
5. I feel destructive (want to throw and break things and hear the breaking sound).

But the weird thing is...
I'm not sure why I was so angry, what I was so angry about. It's just that I feel like being angry that time.

Sucks...
.....
...
..
.

Even now if the topic is brought up, I might end up feeling the same emotion, which I'm not sure about. Is it anger? Is it something else?

burden pt.2

and i am still tearing
drops trickle unexpectedly
waves of guilt within me
will we walk away a stronger entity?

will the goodness (i thought it was good) slip away?
such a facade
or are we too blind to see?
i am strugling with this uncertainty

credit: a.s. (comment to the post 'taking it for the granted')

Burden

Right now, there is a burden in my heart
A burden I wish to redeem soon
A burden caused by my own ignorance
A burden caused by my own action
I've never felt this burden inside
Probably because I am too thick to notice
Because my own ego entice
Right now I'm trying to redeem
Hopefully the chance will arrive
The chance where I can say to you
face to face
that I love you